How you divorce can set the tone for your co-parent relationship

“Till death do us part,” you said. As a divorcing parent, you do not need to wait that long to cut the final cord that binds you to your spouse. It’s more like “till the kids turn 18,” at the very least.

While divorce can end your marriage in a matter of months, your children still tie you together. Let’s say your child just turned five. Your legal responsibilities as co-parents end once your child turns 18, and so do the custody arrangements you make. Do you want to spend the next 13 years arguing over minor details or choreographing your schedules to avoid bumping into each other at your child’s school play or the local coffee shop? Probably not.

You are parents for life

Even when your child turns 18 years of age, your role as a parent is unlikely to stop. Life will be difficult for you and your child if events such as their graduation, their wedding or their child’s first birthday become a balancing act because you and your ex refuse to be in a room together.

How easy or difficult your post-marital parenting relationship will be, comes down, in part, to the divorce process. If you enter the divorce ring trying to beat each other at any cost, you will both emerge battered and bruised. The verdict may leave one of you wanting a rematch.

Uncontested divorce

If you consider divorce as less of a contest and more of a peace negotiation, it will be easier to co-parent afterward. Understanding more about how uncontested divorces work can benefit any divorcing couple. As parents, you have even more reasons to consider it.